Monday, October 23, 2006

The Scream by Edvard Munch

[CHAN] - Life is a question of POWER.
Yiwen -> Ben : Neh.. its doesn't really make me feel better. I want to scream it out loud, but there are people to consider. :I

Yiwen ->Michelle : THANKS.. Kopi-O-Orh? Mai Tne hor... :O

Yiwen -> Amanda Loh: The interesting thing about life is entertainment. And that you are. :)

Well I've realised 2 things during the last 4 days:
1) Happiness never last forever. Seriously. It's true.
2) Ignorance is BLISS. Seriously. This is completely true as well.

I don't remember feeling miserable. Although I've been told I cried till my eyes were RED and SWOLLEN. But crying didn't change anything. The people, the situation. And sometimes, when I'm trying to remember the things that came before, I start wondering what's inside me, ticking, ready to go off. Suddenly my life is so quiet. So still. I feel old to know SO MUCH.
So. My sister just commented that I show signs of "teen angst". (intense feeling of emotional strife) and that I should be a writer when i grow up. She said I show signs of excitement and melancholy. Or maybe I could even start now. From Scratch. Well you see, since last week, life has been well, MEANINGLESS and absolutely exhausting. It's as though I feel like white hair's about to sprout outta my head any second. You know, watch out, my brain's gonna explode. And who do I blame this misfortune on? NOBODY! Well I kinda blame myself for not treasuring what I used to have. I would give ANYTHING to go back to the past.

Have you ever experienced something which you completely put your trust to. And that THING totally BETRAYED you? Stabbed you in the back when u least expect it? Well, I have. And it's a terrible feeling. OH the disappointment...

OK enough about misfortunes. For the past 2 days, I've been going to Milenia Walk. I volunteered in the great eastern women 10K run. Well my role was the "EXPO OFFICIAL" whatever that means. The people were fun and great and everything. It was terrific. Meeting new people and doing something (ANYTHING!) to take my mind of blaaaaaa. Well the good point about this project was that:

- I get paid ( not much. It's just some allowance)
- I meet new people.
- I got time to kill
- I get LOADSSSSSS of free stuff (best part)
-> I got:
+2 Adidas Caps
+2 Adidas shirts
+2 Adidas singlets
+A free bag
+like 20 bottles of mineral water? (well not bring home DUH, But drink there.) I swear. I went to the toilet every 10 minutes. Cos it was air conditioned, and well, my lips were cracking and I seriously needed lip balm and my fingers were like concrete. The lines were so PROMINENT.
+5 Body scrub (distribute to other ppl cos I don't need 5!)
+6 Activa blaaa (whatever u call it)
+And many others.

Well I loved it there. And I'll be going for the event day which is next Sunday. Hmmm.. Cos this was just EXPO.

Melancholia - Mood of non-specific depression. Characterised by low levels of enthusiasm and low levels of eagerness for activity.

Thanks readers. For going through this post.

Ernie & Chan

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